Psalm 31:21,22 – “Amazing”

As always, here’s my fairly literal translation of these verses:

²¹Blessed be the LORD, because He has done amazingly His love to me in a besieged city. ²²And I spoke in my alarm, “I am cut off from before Your eyes!” Surely You heard the call of my prayers I cried for help to You.

If one reads different translations, you’ll see that some translate it “in a besieged city” and others “in a strong city.” Those would seem to be two different ideas. The problem is that in Hebrew it could be either. In their “picture-telling” kind of minds, there is no difference, since a besieged city would have to be a strong city. Enemies only laid siege because they found the walls impregnable. If the walls were flimsy, they’d just crash through and conquer it. So, it could be either.

Personally, I think the most natural understanding of the word would be “besieged.” David isn’t describing himself in any position of strength. Rather the exact opposite is true. All through this Psalm he feels under attack. He finds his strength in the Lord.

We all can relate of course. I’m guessing we all feel too often like we live in a besieged city. And at particular times it gets really bad. We get into bad situations and feel there is no way out. It seems like there are no answers and we can’t see any hope.

David even admits to his weak faith at that very time. “In my alarm I said, ‘I am cut off from Your sight!’” David was at that point we all get to in our troubles – that point where the hopelessness seems overwhelming and God’s promises seem very small and far away. We may feel at those times (and even say) that God has forsaken us, that He has turned away from us. Those feelings only get bolstered by the fact that “our sin is ever before us.” We are all keenly aware, if God did desert us, it would be exactly what we deserve.

We need to say here it is a shameful thing at times like this that we falter believing God’s promises, that we accuse Him and our hearts question His faithfulness. That’s what David is doing and exactly what we too often do. This is the same God who tells us, “while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” This is the same God who says, because of Jesus, we can “come boldly before the Throne of Grace, that we might obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need.” This is the same God who promised, “I will never leave you nor forsake you,” and who promises that “all things work together for good to them that love God.” It is really a shameful thing that we doubt Him.

But notice in the middle of it all something very, very important – although David’s faith may be faltering, he’s still talking to God! Even in our weakest moments, the one right thing we can do is talk to God! Job got pretty surly in the middle of his book, but he never stopped seeing his problems as between him and God. Naomi seems like a bitter woman in the book of Ruth, but she brings the Lord into everything she says. Jeremiah in the book of Lamentations seems to challenge God to His face. And, like the rest of them, here David is, questioning God’s faithfulness – but he does it, like them, still talking to God. This is a great truth I realized at some point – that our God is a big God and He can handle it when people cry out to Him even in their despair, even when they accuse Him and are angry at Him. He can handle it if someone tells Him, “I’m not sure I even believe in You.” The important thing in the end is not the greatness of our faith, but rather the object of our faith and His greatness!

Under grace, this is simply a part of the struggle of faith for us forlorned believers living with our sinful selves in a fallen world. In every painful moment faith actually ends up being a wrestling match, as it were, for us to lay hold the promises of God. Dickson noted,

“There may be in a soul at one time both grief oppressing, and hope upholding: both darkness of trouble, and the light of faith; both desperately doubting, and strong gripping of God’s truth and goodness; both a fainting and a fighting; a seeming yielding in the fight, and yet a striving of faith against all opposition; both a foolish haste, and a settled staidness of faith; as here, ‘I said in my haste,’ etc.”

But as we take our doubts and fears and anger and even unbelief to God, what happens? He shows His “amazing love” to us. He hears our cries for help. I want to point out that many translations call it His “wonderful love.” The Hebrew word is better translated today as “amazing.” The word “wonderful” used to mean exactly that – full of wonder, amazing, but today I think “wonderful love” means more something like “pleasant” or “comfortable.” It definitely doesn’t have the connotation of amazement any more. What God shows us is His amazing love – a love that we didn’t expect, a love that turns out to be “immeasurably more than we could have asked or thought.” We cry out to Him even in our doubting and, as the years go by, one time after another after another after another, He answers with a love and kindness that simply leaves us amazed.

That is because He is amazing. I’ve heard people beat themselves up for being “amazed” at God. My answer is, “Of course you’re amazed. That’s because He is amazing! You can’t get close to Him without being amazed. Any time He touches your life, expect to be amazed. He is amazing! That is simply who He is.”

The right response is not to beat ourselves up about our lack of faith, but rather to just let Him amaze us and, with David say, “Blessed be the Lord, for He showed to me His amazing love when I was in a besieged city!”

His love is amazing. It’s okay to be amazed. It’s okay to struggle believing in that amazing love when despair and fear overwhelm us. We just need to keep crying, keep talking, keep calling out to Him. And as we do cry out to Him, it’s only a matter of time and we’ll be saying, “Blessed be the Lord for His amazing love!”